Public Liability Insurance Scandal!
you may have heard the rumours: the world's elite -
politicians, high-brow celebrities, royalty, wealthy
businessmen - are actually an evil race of
shape-shifting alien reptiles that are hell-bent on
In its most simple form, this outrageous claim is
actually true: there ARE shape-shifting reptiles living
among us (most of them are actually those wealthy
socialites from the television - you know of whom I
The truth, however, is far more sinister and
unimaginable as it is downright sordid. To know the
truth is to carry a heavy burden, and I blame none who
wish to turn away now and continue living life without
the knowledge I now possess, which haunts my dreams at
night. So, read no further if you wish to live safely in
your ignorance, holding dear to all that you take for
granted. But please - do not chastise me should you
decide to read on, for you have been warned...
Shape-shifting reptiles are managed, controlled and
governed by none other than public liability insurance
Click here for quotes! (Seriously)
Yes, it is
true - these friendly, helpful insurance advisors, for
whom we all hold a special place close to our heart,
would sooner make a tasty meal out of business owners
(apparently human giblets make excellent gravy) than
help locate a secure policy with excellent premiums.
Business owners beware: next time you scour the
documents of a public liability insurance policy, read
the small print; you may be signing away your rights to
your own intestines, an area of the human digestive
tract coveted by the shape-shifters, offering as it does
an excellent source of iron.
So before you shake the hand of a public liability
insurance advisor, let alone sign any policy documents,
know the truth: that public liability insurance does not
cover your business in the event a member of the public
suffers an accident at your workplace; it covers YOUR
bodily parts in the event YOU suffer an accident,
allowing them - those evil reptilians - to claim your
innards for their own culinary plans.
And don't even get me started on mortgage advisors...
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